What Your Guy's Face Tells You

According to Cosmo, mention the words sharing and feeling--especially in the same sentence--and even a guy who's extremely comfortable with you will run for the nearest sports bar where he can mingle with his buds and get away from the crazy lady. Men are taught to stifle their emotions, so they often have trouble communicating what they're thinking and feeling. It's not "manly."

But, don't despair. His face can give him away. That's because the muscles in the face are directly linked to the emotion center of the brain. The slightest shift in mood registers as a specific facial gesture. Learn to decode these clues, and you've got a view into your guy's soul:

1. When he turns his head to the right or left in the middle of a conversation, he's not in the mood to chat. He's using the head turn to put some distance between you, even if he's not physically taking a step back. It may not have anything to do with you or even the conversation; he may have had a difficult day at work. Something has clearly upset him, and getting in his face will only push him away further. So, give him what he's asking for: space. Whether that's 20 minutes or 2 hours. Realize that it may take the average man 20 minutes to an hour to relax and fully process a situation and it's crucial that you give him that time.
2. You and your guy are at a party, and you lock gazes with him from across the room. You notice that his eyes look sleepy and droopy. He's ready for bed. And I'm not talking about going to sleep. When people feel a strong sexual urge they lapse into a more dreamy state. There's a reason why they're called "bedroom eyes." What do you do? Whisper in his ear all the naughty things you're going to do to him when you get him home; ramp up his arousal. Then wander back to your friends and mingle some more. The teasing will make him crazy. Just be sure you follow-through on your promises when you get home!
3. If you're talking with your man and he purses his lips several times, pay attention. He has something to tell you. According to David B. Givens, PhD, when a person has something to say, "the brain sends a message to the tongue and lips to start shaping the sentiment. You're seeing his thought expressed before he even has a chance to come out with the words." What can you do? Don't force him. In case you hadn't noticed, men aren't usually very forthcoming, and trying to coax the words out of him may have the opposite effect and cause him to clam up. Give him time to collect his thoughts and formulate the words. If he continues to struggle, change the subject to put him at ease. You can return to the original subject later.
4. If your guy pauses midsentence and the tip of his tongue protrudes slightly from his lips, it means he's self-censoring. Givens says that "this reflex signals the speaker is anxious, which is often how people will feel when they're afraid they're going to leak information. Before you try to beat the information out of him," Givens goes on, "realize that what he's trying to hide might be something good (something fun for you) or not even about you." It's okay to keep some secrets from your partner. But if curiosity is getting the better of you, read between the lines. What were you talking about when he paused? Gently steer the conversation back that way and, if you're lucky, he might let something slip.
5. There's a way you can tell when your guy is totally into you. While looking at you, he'll slightly tilt his head and shrug his shoulder at the same time. "In a long-term relationship," Givens says, "this happens when the man feels a surge of love. It's an unconscious way of getting you closer to him because he's craving romance and affection." So what do you do? What do you do? This is your chance to cash in on some easy lovin'. Do something special for him. "Guys love it when you do something with them that they love even though it's not your thing, because it shows you're willing to put their needs first," Givens says. The pay-off? He'll be anxious to return the favor.
   

Gentle reader, pay attention to your man's face when you're talking or being close. It will give you clues about what he's thinking and feeling. Fellow writer, use this with your heroes. Even the most taciturn of men will have a flicker of his eye, a tightening of his lips, and we all know about that heavy-lidded look he gets when he's "in the mood."