Reflections

Thursday, December 24, 2009

Friday Funny--A Day Early

Dementia Test

Below are four (4) questions and a bonus question to test your perception, reasoning and the quickness of your logical processing. They are stated simply so you should try to answer them instantly. To assure the accuracy of the results, you should not take your time , but instead, answer each of them immediately... then move on to the next question.

Ready?

Let's find out just how clever you really are....

Question: You are a participant in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in?

Answer : If you answered that you are first, then you are absolutely WRONG! If you over take the second person and you take his place, YOU are in second place!

Try not to screw up next time. Now answer the second question, but don't take as much time as you took for the first question, OK?

Second Question : If you overtake the last person, then you are...?

Answer : If you answered that you are second to last, then you are.... WRONG again. Tell me, Sunshine, how can you overtake the LAST person??

You're not very good at this, are you?

Third Question: Very tricky arithmetic! Note: This must be done in your head only. Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator.

Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000 Now add 30 . Add another 1000 . Now add 20 . Now add another 1000 . Now add 10 . What is the total?

Scroll down for the correct answer...

Did you get 5000?

The correct answer is actually 4100.

If you don't believe it, check it with a calculator! Today is definitely not your day, is it? Maybe you'll get the last question right... Maybe....

Fourth Question: Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2.. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono, and ??? What is the name of the fifth daughter?

Did you answer Nunu? NO! Of course it isn't. Her name is Mary, you retard! Read the question again!

Okay, now the bonus round, i.e., a final chance to redeem yourself:

A mute person goes into a shop and wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of brushing his teeth he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done. Next, a blind man comes into the shop who wants to buy a pair of sunglasses; how does HE indicate what he wants?

It's really very simple. He opens his mouth and ask for it...

Does your employer actually pay you to think?? If so, do NOT let them see your answers for this test!

Friday, December 18, 2009

Friday Funny

In the holiday spirit...

ONIONS & CHRISTMAS TREES

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, "Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?"

The father, surprised, answers, "Well, son, there are three kinds of boobs: in her 20's, a woman's are like melons, round and firm. In her 30's to 40's, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions."

"Onions?"

"Yes, you see them and they make you cry."

This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter said, "Mom, how many kinds of 'willies' are there?"

The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, "Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In his 20's, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30's and 40's, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable. After 50, it is like a Christmas tree."

"A Christmas tree?"

"Yes--the root's dead and the balls are just for decoration."