Friday Funny

A cabbie picks up a Nun.

She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY handsome cab driver won't stop staring at her.

She asks him why he is staring.

He replies, "I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend you."

She answers, "My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive."

"Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me."

She responds, "Well, let's see what we can do about that: #1, you have to be single and #2, you must be Catholic."

The cab driver is very excited and says, "Yes, I'm single and Catholic!"

"OK," the nun says. "Pull into the next alley."

The nun fulfills his fantasy, with a kiss that would make a hooker blush.

But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.

"My dear child," says the nun, "why are you crying?"

"Forgive me but I've sinned. I lied and I must confess, I'm married and I'm Jewish."

The nun says, "That's OK. My name is Kevin and I'm going to a Halloween party."

HAPPY HALLOWEEN !!!

My Dragons Are Doing Well, Thank You

DRAGONHEAT was the #1 best seller in September and the #5 best seller overall in the third quarter at Amber Heat.



DRAGONFIRE, it's prequel, had new life breathed into it and picked up the #9 best seller slot for September.


Thanks to everyone who purchased them!

Tipsy Tuesday

Show, don't tell. If I had a nickle for every time I've heard those three words... Well, I wouldn't be rich, but I'd have more money.

There are many ways to show your reader what's happening (versus telling her via exposition). Sometimes exposition is necessary, but sometimes it isn't.

For example:

I saw the look on my husband's face and waited for the explosion.
"Are you kidding me?" he asked, his face turning beet-red. "What was she thinking?"
There was the problem. Our oldest daughter seldom thought before she acted. It was almost as if she had an allergy to common sense. "She didn't mean any harm," I defended.
"She never means any harm." He shook his head. He loved the girl, I knew, and was as deeply frustrated by her actions as he was baffled.


Now, how about something like this:

"Now, Charlie, don't get mad."
"Are you kidding me?" His face turned beet-red. "What was she thinking?"
"Well, that's the problem. She doesn't think." I shrugged. "It's like she's allergic to common sense. But she didn't mean any harm."
"She never means any harm." He shook his head. "I love her, but by God she frustrates me. I just don't get it."

See the difference? Sometimes it's just a little thing, but it can get across the same information by showing, not telling.

Man Meat Monday

Are words even needed?

I don't think so!

(Thanks to Colleen Love for the pic!)

Friday Funny

How to be cruel to old guys:

AARP Eye Chart

The Maverick and the Maiden

This is just so disturbing on so many levels...

I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

Tipsy Tuesday

By the very nature of the calling, fiction writers are liars. A good fiction writer, therefore, must be a good liar. Specific, concrete details in a story, as every good liar knows, is what's needed to persuade your mark (or your reader) that what you're telling them is the God's truth. If you provide your reader with a variety of sensory details and let them draw their own conclusions, they will be participants in your story and not merely observers.

And then you'll have 'em. Janet Burroway in her book Writing Fiction calls this significant detail. Significant detail is the sort of detail that means both what it says and also more than what it says.

If you want to write fiction, you not only have to mean what you write, but mean more than you write.